September 23, 2013:
Alright, this is just getting ridiculous. right when I think the mission can`t get any more difficult, Heavenly Father throws me another curveball, and I have no choice but to look up and say, "touché...".
This week has been probably my hardest one yet. you all remember how they recently made me district leader? well, that`s still going about the same amount of difficult. And now, they just put some more on my plate, A BRAND NEW ELDER. He`s straight out of Bolivia, and he literally NEVER talks. not even in the lessons. sometimes, I stop talking in a lesson and wait for him the folllow my lead, and he just looks at me and says, "Can we leave now?" and I just sit there feeling awkward because after 2 seconds in a house, he`s already wanting to leave without having said anything... it`s bad, but I`m not complaining. If he was put with me, it`s obviously a trial I can`t handle. I`ve tried the stern trainer approach, and he just rebelled more and told me he hated me and stormed off into the room. I literally live with a 6 year old trapped in a 19 year old body. but it`s cool, I don`t dislike him or anything, it`s just always been hard for me to teach people with a learning disability THIS STRONG. But all of you there are probably saying, "that`s exactly why he`s with you, Stormy, that`s what you have to change about yourself in this companionship", But if ANYONE has ANY advice, PLEASE let me know, because I`m all out of ideas and nothing`s changed. I`ve tried to explain rules to him, and he says "I`m not gonna follow that rule, cause in my house I didn`t have to do that", And I just wanna say, "Well, have President transfer you to your house so you can sleep all day then..." but I dont, haha.
ANYWAY, on a completely seperate note, I heard a lesson that really impacted me in church yesterday:
Inactivating yourself from the church is like freezing to death. at first, you feel the spirit leave just like one feels the cold setting in. but with more time outside, the numbness sets in, and we stop feeling anything at all. we don`t feel the spirit, but we come accustomed to it, just like the freezing cold turns to numbness, and even an eerie sense of warmth, right before we close our eyes and die.
So, being inactive, and feeling okay with it, is really just another symptom of spiritual death, not God`s approval of your absence from the church or anything similar. but someone with hypothermia or frostbite, stops realizing they`re dying until someone comes from the outside to save them.
We`re those people. so let`s remember that.